This. is Me.

Becky ziplining

This. is Me.

I ain’t necessarily skinny, or perfect, or predictable.

I have my flaws, and  Oh! they are many, and I can name them all.

I am a survivor of terrible things, but also a thriver –

I want new, different, and scary, all outside these walls.

I offer myself, unreservedly, to those who will care to listen,

Whether tiny, or medium, or tall tall tall.

My hero is Joan of Arc, because tho’ she did end on a burning stake,

She didn’t go quietly, or actually – at all.

Her energy was transformed to spirit and became legend and large,

And she forged a path and answered His call.

So when I am a ghost and my visage is faded from your view,

I want my legacy to be “CANNON BALLLLLLL!”





Check out my new blog, From Conception to Birth, also on WordPress!


Shesabadmother has been pretty quiet, mostly because I am writing a book on vocational transitions!
Check out my book blog, From Conception to Birth, on WordPress. You can also reach it by going to
Let me know what you think! And I am looking for additional interview subjects, especially minorities, gay or lesbian folks, and atheists or agnostics (to better reflect the general population). Contact me via the other blog…peace to you!

What to read in 2015

bookshelfBecause reading tastes are so individual, I don’t really like to give suggestions in so broad a scale; but these are the books that I am going to / have read in 2015, and maybe something on here will strike your fancy, or resonate with you; you can check back with me if you have read them, and what you thought! (Leave feedback in the “comment” section) They are in no particular order.

1. “Unbroken”, Laura Hillenbrand

2. “A.D. 30”, Ted Dekker

3. “An Unbroken Bond”, Edie Lutnick

4. “Science and Human Behavior”, B.F. Skinner

5. “The Lake”, Banana Yoshimoto

6. “A New Psychology of Women: Gender, Culture and Ethnicity”, Hilary M. Lips

7. “The Discernment of Spirits: An Ignatian Guide for Everyday Living”, Timothy M. Gallagher, OMV

8. “Around the Next Corner”, Elizabeth Wrenn

9. “Beyond Freedom and Dignity”, B.F. Skinner

10. “Amrita”, Banana Yoshimoto

11. “When Everything Changes, Change Everything: In a Time of Turmoil, a Pathway to Peace”, Neale Donald Walsch

12. “Soul Detox”, Craig Groeschel

13. “Adam and Eve After the Pill: Paradoxes of the Sexual Revolution”, Mary Eberstadt

14. “Hear the Wind Sing”, “Pinball, 1973”, and “A Wild Sheep Chase”:  (aka: “The Trilogy of the Rat”), Haruki Murakami

15. “Bolivie”, Alfonso Gumucio Dagron (essay)

16. “Death with Interruptions” (aka: Death in Intervals), Jose Saramago

17. “Equalizing Christmas”, Vassilis Steriadis

18. “Letter from Dublin,” Vicky Theodoropoulou

19. “Case Studies in Abnormal Behavior”, 8th Edition; Meyer, Chapman, & Weaver

20. “Finders Keepers”, Stephen King

21. “The Way of Serenity”, Fr. Jonathan Morris





This House Is Haunted (book review)

this house is haunted

(On impulse, I grabbed this book from the display table of my local library; the photo on the front grabbed my attention first, and then the title.  Proof that I am primarily a visual person!)

“This House is Haunted”, by John Boyne (who also wrote “The Boy in the Striped Pajamas”), is a ghost story spun from the point of view of a stubborn, bookish governess, and is set in 1867.

For some of you, that would be enough, you’d be off to order it from your local library or (gasp!) download it onto your Kindle.

For the REST of you, for anyone who has read Dickens and his description of 19th-century England (and the clear-cut, sociological examinations of issues of class, gender, and opportunity – or lack thereof – ), or is entranced by the ghostly mystery of “Jane Eyre,” you will absolutely adore this book!  The 21-year-old governess, Ms. Eliza Caine, is a sturdy woman.  She is the only child of a sweet, educated entomologist whose admiration of Charles Dickens (who makes an appearance in the beginning chapters of the book) is childlike with delight.

I can’t say a whole lot more without giving away key aspects of the plot, so I won’t.

I didn’t want it to end – at a slim 291 pages, I found myself wishing Mr. Boyne had dragged it out a little more, had added more ghostly encounters or added more characters, had had someone else come to their demise…


Finding A New Favorite Author


   When your favorite pastime is reading, it’s very difficult to find a favorite writer.  You find yourself automatically gravitating towards your old standbys, in the hope that they have written something fresh.  About two months ago, I picked up a book that my (young) old friend Lisa had given me years ago.  Somehow it got lost in the shuffle of the piles and piles of books that she has given me over the years…and the author has become my new favorite!

    Tana French is an Irish author who has lived all over the world and has a very fresh voice.  An author’s “voice” is the style, genre, or tone in which they write a majority of their books.  Tana’s voice is homey yet mysterious, fresh though familiar.  She writes murder mysteries set in urban and rural Ireland.  Her debut novel is “In the Woods.”  It was released in 2007,  and won the Edgar Award that year for Best First Novel.  It is a breathtaking first offering!  I stayed up many nights past midnight in order to finish it.  In fact, I never read it during the day; it seemed as if reading it at night after my whole family had tucked in and was sleeping, lent the book greater mystery. 

    “In the Woods” tells the story of a traumatizing event involving Detective Rob Ryan.  He was playing in the woods as a child when two of his friends were kidnapped; this event links him to a current murder that he and his partner are called upon to solve.  He avoids recollecting this childhood trauma during the investigation, and even hides the connection when he is questioned by others who remember the kidnapping.  The plot is twisty, and vacillates between urgency and thoughtful recollection of Detective Ryan’s past.  I found myself wondering whether Ryan himself was involved in the murder!

     I am in the middle of French’s fourth novel, “Broken Harbor”, and this one also keeps me breathless.  French’s humane description of detectives and their personal trials, and suspects and their broken lives, holds me captive.  I am so happy that she has a new novel coming out in September of this year…but then I remember that I am almost done with this book and wonder what I will do with my summer while I wait!  Perhaps I can dig up the latest Michael Chabon 🙂

     Check out Tana French’s books at and hold your breath with me!



Why read?


     I was doing laundry today and thinking, why do I have books as a major accessory in every room of the house?  What do I get out of reading?  And I thought: COMPASSION.  Every book I read grows compassion in me for people who are nothing like me; makes me tender, more vulnerable, more prone to mercy. It’s also why I encourage my children to read, because something I say may not get through to them, but something they read may do that very thing. I encourage my children to read positive, creative and developmentally-appropriate material.
Of course, there is the secondary benefit of being entertained by something someone else worked super-hard to create. I like supporting the arts, both theoretically and literally, and Brad and I often go to art galleries or the movies or to see bands. I like to “buy local” as well, and so eagerly anticipate locally writers when they have books that are published. I have two friends and two relatives who have written their own books, I think that’s so amazing!
A tertiary benefit is education about a topic or theme. Sometimes a certain topic, author, or moment in time will grab my attention, and I will read everything I can find about it. I will walk away feeling that I learned something that I didn’t know, and will anticipate being able to share that with Brad on one of our date nights.
Last but not least is the aspect of self-care. Besides eating right and not being a couch potato all winter, reading a good book that challenges me and takes me out of my comfort zone is a way to “treat” myself, to exercise my brain, and to refuse to limit myself to a standard set of ideas or notions. There have been a few books that didn’t match up with my value system and made me flat-out uncomfortable, and it’s okay to take those books back to the library, I don’t feel guilty about that. I always ask myself the “what” of the discomfort and make the decision based on that answer. If it’s something that would dishonor my self by continuing the read, it goes out to the door.
Support your local library today! And every once in awhile, purposefully pick a book by an author you have never heard of, or a title that doesn’t ring a bell. You may be pleasantly surprised!